So...This Is My 30's?

Testosterone Tuesday (Evening Edition)
November 07, 2006

A little publicized piece of news from the world of That 30's Guy: I landed NY Giants tickets for this past Sunday's unexpected squeaker vs. the Houston Texans. Guys I work with are season ticket holders, and I was caught off-guard with a ticket offer Friday morning. Naturally, it took me no time to jump on the opportunity.

I hadn't been to the Stadium since the 2004 home opener vs. Washington. It was such a different atmosphere than the road game at Atlanta a few weeks ago. On Sunday, I saw folks who drove in trucks and trailers painted in Giants-blue with the NY logo, propped up plasma screen TV 's hooked up to Direct TV dishes, or had their X-box set up so they could play Madden'07. There were a few bands, too. Oh, and not to mention Jersey girls looking so damn hot in Giants gear. What an environment!

It got better. Among the bunch of us, we had a couple of seats down in Row 1 in the corner of an endzone. Because this was my first trip with the group, they gave dibs for the first half in one of those seats. I never had been this close to the action before. I got to see Tiki Barber break a long TD run right towards us. We could hear the hits and grunts as if we were down in the action. For the 2nd half, I moved up to the other seats in the upper tier at the 50 yard line. These weren't so bad either since you could see the plays develop. Shit, though.: if I sat anywhere I would have been happier than a pig in shit!

Ah yes. NFL football on a cool November day. I can't think of many better ways to spend a Sunday.

While the Giants looked pretty flat against a bad Texans-team, I contribute that to sitting a few dinged up players like Plaxico Burress (back), and Sam Madison (hamstring) in preperation for this Sunday's huge clash with the Chicago Bears. I won't lose sight of the fact that Big Blue's two best defensive players, Michael Strahan and Osi Umenyora, are injured. I have faith Osi will play with Strahan now being out for 2-4 weeks. No matter what, I think this offense can score on this suddenly-vulnerable defense of the Bears, and I think the defense can pressure Rex Grossman enough to force him into making a few mistakes.

Now, some takes on what's what in the world of sports and entertainment.

Back in September I said I would start drinking the Cincinnati Bengal Kool-Aid. I've decided I ain't thirsty anymore.
What the hell took Britney Spears so damn long to decide that jerk Kevin Federline was no good? The damage is now done, regardless. No--I'm not talking about her bank account. She actually had the brains to have him sign a pre-nup. I'm talking about the body, and her (ahem) singing career. Here's to hoping she can be 2007's Comback Queen.
By the way, that ploy to show off the rebounding bod on Letterman last night was way too obvious.
The fact that the Miami Dolphins handed the Chicago Bears their first loss of the season some 20 years after doing it to the 1985 team freaks me out.
Memo to Patriots fans: you're team really isn't that good. You beat one team with a winning record this year, and that team was an overachieving Minnesota Vikings who lost to the hapless 49ers this weekend 9-6. Lucky you, because this week you face another overachiever coming back down to Earth this weekend in the Jets.
A true example of spin-doctoring: Faith Hill says her freak out on the CMA's the other night (you've seen the clip) was a joke. In case you missed it, the has-been country music hottie lost out to piece-o-ass in the making, Carrie Underwear, er,wood, and the camera caught her screaming,"WHAT!" in shock. Nice try, Faith. Maybe you should check in to rehab like every other celeb who gets caught fucking up.
Speaking of losing, I had what may have been my worst week picking NFL games ever: Vs. the Spread - 3 correct; Straight up - 5 correct. Now I remember why I never bet on football...or any sport for that matter.
I love this story I read about women's tennis star Elena Dementieva said that male models hired as ball boys for the WTA Championships need to concentrate on their job and not the players. Look, I don't know about you, but if I saw Maria Sharapova a few feet from me looking like this, I'd have a little problem standing up.
Come to think of it, it makes sense to hire male models to go fetch balls.
Seeing all the hot chicks in their Giants gear at the game Sunday reminded me of how I once thought I'd marry a Jersey girl whom I met at a game. This was while I lived in the Garden State. So, to the really cute girl who said hi to me when our met in the crowd: Sorry, babe. You missed me by 4 years.
When will we hear who the winners of baseball's annual awards are? In case you missed it a month ago, here were my picks: Justin Mourneau (AL MVP), Ryan Howard (NL MVP), Roy Oswalt (NL Cy Young--it's a weak crop), Johan Santana (AL Cy Young), Jim Leyland (AL Manager of the Year), and Joe Girardi (NL Manager of the Year).
On the topic of award winners, Derek Jeter getting an AL Gold Glove over the Red Sox's Alex Gonzalez was a fucking joke. At least he didn't win a ring to wear with that glove!
If you didn't get out and vote today, then you've lost the right to bitch for the next two years.