Listed on BlogShares So...This Is My 30's?


 

My 20's have been left behind and my 30's has begun. This is my journey into the next phase of adulthood.

So, should I be feeling any different?

David Ortiz is God

He did it again.

How many times has the sports world said those four words about David Ortiz the last two-plus years?

With the Red Sox trailing 8-6 in the bottom of the 9th against the Cleveland Indians tonight, one out against them, "Big Papi" came to the plate and launched a bomb to straight-away centerfield (not an easy feat in Fenway Park) to give the Sawks a 9-8 victory.

I've said it before, and I'll say it again: David Ortiz is THE GREATEST clutch hitter I've ever seen. With the exception of maybe Derek Jeter (and I say that hesitantly), I can't think of anyone I'd want to have step up to the plate with a playoff series on the line. Which reminds me of a maddening discussion I heard Saturday night on ESPN Radio between the "Gamenight" hosts, Amy Lawrence (a former local sports-radio personality in these parts) and Steve Some Guy (sorry, don't know his name).

The debate was that if you were facing the Red Sox in Game 7 of the World Series with a one-run lead in the 9th, first base open, would you walk David Ortiz to get to Manny Ramirez? Would you face Big Papi and take your chances instead of giving Manny a chance to win the game? As a Red Sox fan who watches the team night in/night out, I'd walk Ortiz and face Manny. Why? Because Ramirez is as big a choker in game-deciding situations as any "superstar" hitter I've ever seen. Ms. Lawrence, showing why her contract did not get renewed by the local station, argued that she'd pitch to Ortiz because Manny is a "better overall hitter" for his career, and is a better "clutch hitter"! What the fuck is she talking about?! Apparently, her bra must have been on too tight. I can't recall the last time Manny won a game for Boston with defeat staring them square in the face. Obviously, Amy didn't bother to look into the earlier highlights from Saturday's game because the Angels opted to walk Ortiz to get to Manny with the game tied in the bottom of the 9th and runners in scoring position. As has usually been the case, Boston $20 million dollar man ground out into a double play.

I rest my case. It's women like you, Amy, who give female sports broadcasters a bad rap.

Oh, not to be ignored, the trading deadline passed, and my Red Sox did ZERO to improve the team. So basically, what Theo Epstein is telling Red Sox Nation is the season's success hangs in the balance on the creeky knee of 43-year-old butterball David Wells and the right arm of the mentally-weak (and still injured) Matt Clement? Ugh.

If only Superman could pitch, too.

posted by That 30's Guy @ 10:50 PM, |


Excuse the Absence

As I'm sure many of you can relate, starting a new job can be a little draining, especially when you are entering an entirely new industry. I feel like I'm back at school, having done a lot of reading last week. By 4pm each day, I was about ready to get up from my desk and scream like a raving lunatic. Reading from books to learn is one thing, but getting absolutely no hands-on and human instruction is a bit boring. Thankfully, my cousin (whom I'll be working with directly in the same position) is done with his systems training he had to go through and can now get into the nitty gritty with me. By the time Friday came around, I felt like I was getting familiar with how I needed to do my job, and especially getting familiar with the system I'll be handling.

Since it's nearly 11pm and I should really be hitting the sack, I'll just brush by what's up:

posted by That 30's Guy @ 10:40 PM, |


Information Overload

These first couple of days at the new job is making my brain feel like it will explode!

Problem with a new job, no matter how much of an improvement it will be over the old one, is learning how to do it. I've spent the better part of my first two days reading pages and pages of material about the products I'll be dealing with. My cousin, who will be working with me, told me to concentrate on one product in particular because a lot of the accounts he'll be handing over to me will deal with it primarily. Being out of college for so long has lead me to forget just how draining studying can be if it's all you do!

The people have have been really nice and aren't expecting me to learn everything in one week. I see early signs that this is a better run business, too. People have coverage when they are out on vacation. People work together and are more sociable. This morning I had a good chat about the Giants with another Giants fan who sits diagonally from my desk. He believes he and I will be working on projects together once I'm up to speed on this product. He even admits that after 2 years he doesn't know as much as he should! We'll make an interesting team, to say the least.

Of course, it wouldn't be me if something didn't go wrong to mar my first day. At the end of the day, my car dies right in the parking lot! My cousin tried to jump me, but the car was not starting. I believed it to be the alternator based on prior experience with cars I owned. I had no choice but to call Batgirl to ask if she could make the 35-minute drive to come get me. I waited for her at a bar with my cuz, and we gave the the car another go. After leaving her battery connected to mine for a good five minutes, we managed to bring it back to life and drive it back north to a mechanic her dad knows. She then drove us around to find a place to eat, then took me to my folks' house so I could borrow my mom's car for today.

Then today, I find out it WASN'T the alternator; it was my battery. That's good news considering it costs less than a new alternator would. The bad news is it still cost over $130.00! I could have bought a battery for half the price and replaced it myself. Ah well. Who knew? Batgirl then went ahead and paid for the car and brought it back to my parents' house to I could make the switch after work. What would I do without her? She was so cool about Monday night's breakdown and having to go out of her way. We celebrate 6 months together on Thursday (well, actually our date is Friday night), and I am just happier than I ever have been with any woman. I just wish this week wasn't so hectic so that I could think more clearly and plan out something more special for her than I have in mind.

posted by That 30's Guy @ 10:42 PM, |


Dirty 30: Happy Birthday to Me

It's finally official. That 30's Guy is...well...30!

As expected I feel like I did when I was 29. Actually, check that. At 29, I felt like I was at a crossroads, and today I don't feel that way. Starting Monday I will be in Day 1 at the new job. I have no clue what they'll be having me do since my new boss (who doesn't work out of the location I'll be in) actually didn't return my call from Friday afternoon. Basically, I'm showing up Monday AM with no idea of who will be training me. I thought it was going to be my cousin, but he told me he has training all week, so some other dude was mentioned as the guy I'll be working with for the week. No matter. I am looking forward to this fresh start; its been a long time coming.

As for the actual birthday, today was basically a day of cleaning up from the bash, and rest. The party was a huge success. I had over 30 guests, and the food was outstanding. I can attribute the success to Batgirl. She really put in a lot of work these last few weeks, and the result was a lot of happy (and full!) guests. While the setting up process, which started Friday night and didn't end until the first two guests arrived, was a real bitch, it felt really good to just hang with everyone and have fun. Some brief highlights:

That talk with Gian has really stuck in my head since we spoke late in the party. While I know where I stand in her heart, hearing it from the point of view from an outsider and knowing how she was so moved it brought tears to her eyes was touching. Gian was always one of the guys in college who'd be there to listen to me when I struck out with the ladies, and has remained that type of friend to this day. He was very moved by the show of emotion from my girlfriend, and he wanted me to know that after the years of frustration, he thinks I've finally got it right. I haven't mentioned to Batgirl that I know about this talk she had, but she did bring up today how she had a deep conversation with Gian, and how she senses he has an enormous amount of respect for me.

You know, you can take all the gifts in the world, but spending the day with my closest friends and the woman I love, and knowing just how much they all respect and care about me is the best present of all.

posted by That 30's Guy @ 10:37 PM, |


Finally--the Final Day, and A Serious Talk



I have quite a bit I wanted to post about these last couple of days, but my life has been a whirlwind. Between preparing for my exit tomorrow (YES--TOMORROW) from the job and getting my ducks lined up for the 30th birthday bas on Saturday, I've had little free time. That said, I brief summary of what's on the mind.
  1. Tomorrow (Friday) is my final day after 4 1/2 years working for my soon-to-be-ex-employer. I think it finally started hitting them today that I'm outta here. I've had little opportunity to train the woman stepping into my duties, and I've been told that NO effort has been made to hire a new person for the department. This was a department already understaffed, and the company is in the height of its bust season. I've continued to be reminded over these last two weeks why I'm leaving. It took me voicing my concern for their well-being that prompted more allotted time for me and my co-worker to sit down today. Simply fucking incredible.

    I'm not sure if I feel any sadness, or will when I drive out of that parking lot for the final time. Sure, I'll miss a lot of my co-workers who are equally miserable as I am. There's a select crop of customers whom I'll miss dealing with as well (one sent me a photo album as a show of gratitude from my service to her these last 4 years). What I won't miss is the departmental disorganized, the poor treatment of customers when issues arise, the miscommunication between departments, the constant feeling of tension and misery in the office, and lack of appreciation for some in management (like my dad)who had set this company on a path to the growth it's enjoyed. Yeah, it's going to be surreal as I go through the motions tomorrow

  2. Just had a long 90-minute talk with Batgirl. She had a really shitty day, ranging from minor issue, to hurtful one, to serious about us. My primary concerns were that her grandfather made a comment to her that she's put on weight. Now, while she isn't the slimmest and trimmest of women, she still is not overweight in the eyes of many and looks good to me. Shit. When she was over last night helping me clean out my back garage, I barely could contain myself seeing her in this tight black tank top that clung to her C's ever so nicely. The dude is 83, and it doesn't shock me insensitive things come out of his mouth. There's more to this issue, but I can cover that another time.

    The next primary issue was in regards to Nern and Angel's wedding next month. I have booked a hotel room near the reception, along with the rest of my friends in the wedding party. You know, so we can have a good time and not worry about driving. Well, Batgirl questioned the need to go back to a hotel that's not very far from where we live to continue partying. I called her out and basically gae it to her that she needs to admit she doesn't feel comfortable with my friends, and that's the issue here. She never fessed up, but nor did she deny the claim. Being that it's her birthday that day, I can understand her desire for private time with me. I also admitted to her that I have to respect her wishes because I am in a relationship, and sometimes one has to turn down something the other doesn't necessarily care to do. Since it's money out of my pocket, I have no problem canceling the room. If I was single, would I have considered not staying there? No.

    I went on to openly question how she is going to be able to get through this party Saturday. I explained to her that while she may not think much of some of my friends and their girls, they in turn have said nothing but good things about Batgirl. I told her that she needs to give people a chance before she can make a final decision on them, and I would appreciate it if she just be herself and mingle; let her personality show through Saturday. I warned that if she doesn't, all the hard work she put in is going to be wasted on herself because she won't be enjoying herself. Believe it or not, my harshness was accepted, and she saw my point. "You're very convincing," she said.

    "I'm not trying to convince you of anything, " I said. "I'm just telling you the truth."

    I feel like a weight was lifted from this talk, but I'd be lying if I didn't say that I am a bit concerned with how things will turn out Saturday.

    Finally, she brought up concerns about accidental pregnancy. My 22-year-cousin just discovered she is pregnant. While she's been with a great guy for the last few years and there was talk of them getting married, this comes as a shock. The girl is not done with college, and he's trying to get established in his career (he's almost 30, by the way). I haven't spoken to her yet, but I'm not quite sure what to say frankly. I don't feel a "congratulations" is appropriate, but at the same time I'd like to be supportive in some way.

    Anyhow, Batgirl is afraid of that happening with us and she doesn't want me to be "stuck" with her the way my cousin and her boyfriend may have to be. I recognize her self-image problem, but I hated the way that sounded. I assured her that she's made me the happiest I've been in a long time, and we will continue to be careful by using the pill and condoms. My feeling is the young couple got sloppy since they've been together for so long and the slip up cost them. While I didn't say it, I do share those same concerns about "accidents," but I think if we are aware of those fears we can avoid it happening. As for the being "stuck" together, I was ready for the question about where this relationship is heading to come next because she's going to be 33 next month. It didn't happen, but I'm sure it crosses her mind, especially considering her sibs are married and her sister has a bun in the oven. If I wanted to have kids of my own and was a woman at 33, I'd probably have the same thing going through my head.

    Batgirl has a lot going for her, but at the same time, she has been shit on by too many people. As a result, she isn't seeing herself like I do. I sense tonight's onslaught of heavy conversation topics were brought on by a lot of frustrations going on in her life. At least we were able to get some things out in the air, and hopefully cleared. I told her she needs to start realizing I love her, am her boyfriend, and it's okay to talk to me about what's on her mind. I may regret that, but I do genuinely care and like seeing her happy. After tonight's talk, we both hung up feeling a lot better.

  3. Yep. A couple of more days and this guy joins the ranks of the Thirty-somethings. I learned a lot from my 20's, and I think I'm better equipped to hit this next decade of life than I was as a teen ten years ago. I hoped to do a post to reminisce and reflect on the last ten years, maybe tell some funny stories. I'll try to do that next week. For now, I'm exhausted and want to hit the sack. I'll be tied up all weekend as I prepare for the next chapter of my life (new decade, new job), so enjoy the next three days!

posted by That 30's Guy @ 11:24 PM, |


How An LDR Helped Me Grow Up

Instead of a post with some nostalgia about my outgoing 20's, I read a post today that I can relate to a lot. In fact, this blogger's post brings up a brief, but significant, period in my late 20's, so it's relevant to what I had intended to write about today.

Over on Bated Breath, Trixie explained why her long distance relationship failed recently. Even though I've been a faithful reader, I didn't quite catch things had ended until today. I was rather shocked since there hadn't been much mention of the guy in recent weeks, and I had no clue things were on the outs. I think the guy had access to her blog, so as a result she had to keep it censored. Believe me--I know the feeling.

In a nutshell (though I encourage you to read the explanation in her own words), the guy moved to Chicago, and she discovered that he just wasn't the right fit for her. When they were thousands of miles apart, they had only their words, and their connection was perfect. It was so perfect, that she fell for him (or so she thought), and they set off on the long distance relationship journey. Unfortunately for my blogger friend, it came to an end when it was time to live in the relationship under normal circumstances. The reality didn't live up to the fantasy. Like so many other LDR's in the history of humankind before this one, it failed. There will be many more in the future of this planet that won't work either.

It's a coincidence this topic comes up because the other night I was listening to my "Killers" CD and heard songs that suddenly reminded me of my LDR-ex. I reflected on how at this time a year ago, I was priming for a fligh tout to spend my 29th birthday with her. For the couple dozen or so of you who were loyal readers of my previous blog, you all got to see a pretty detailed account of my relationship with a woman who lived about a thousand miles away from me. You got to read the beginning, the development, and the heartbreaking end over a 5 month span. I was the dumpee, and naturally I was crushed. I had fallen in love. I was reduced to tears on a couple occasions that day, including when the dump took place (she cried just as hard). I remember it like it was yesterday.

Why do some of us do this to ourselves? I think it's because some of us are just romantics at heart. Me, I'm a lover, not a fighter. I admit it. I got caught up in the unique way we met. We were two bloggers who connected enough to become friendly beyond the blogs, and when we actually met we had instant romantic chemistry. Our first kiss wasn't forced; it was magic. The way we grew closer via the telephone amazes me still. Then when we'd spend our 3-4 day weekends together, it was like some huge event once, sometimes twice, a month. I'd always clean my house top to bottom, get a haircut, and plan out an agenda of things to do here, or when I'd go out there to see her. Still it was never a "normal" date where you'd pick her up at her door, spend a few hours together, and maybe if you're lucky go home together and meet between the sheets. Instead, you'd be showering together, cooking together, watching T.V. together. Bascially, living together, and you've only known this other person for a short time.

I guess the excitement of hopping a plane every few weeks to a great city was part of the appeal for me. Not to mention, I loved her company and the time we spent together. Everything was new and amazing. I'd never had a courtship like this before. It got to the point that I was very sad when we'd say goodbye to each other because when I was with her I was the happiest I had been in a long time. Of course, the question remained, would she have this much of an effect on me if we saw each other every weekend? I asked myself that question a lot heading into the fourth month of the LDR. I was seriously contemplating packing my shit up and taking my chances in the big city, far away from any of my friends and family. It would be all about me and her. Problem was, I wasn't sure if she loved me. In the end, I got my answer: no, she didn't. It turned out for the better though because I did actually find that woman she said I deserved to meet and be loved by.

In retrospect, my 5 months with her taught me a lot. I finally found out that I was capable of a serious relationship. I learned how to be a better boyfriend from what I did right, and what I did wrong. I gained confidence in myself as a lover. Most of all, I learned what it felt like to love, even if it wasn't exactly returned. I never got to tell her how I really felt, but she did eventually find out when I posted it on the old blog. I had to get it off my chest. Soon thereafter, upon reading a rather critical reaction on her blog to the revelation and a holiday gesture I made, I came to quickly figure out that she wasn't what I thought. We never even had what I thought we had. Needless to say, reading that post and her blog in general turned out to be the best thing I could have done in my quest to get over her. While it cut me, I got the slap in the face I really needed.

Since then, I will still stop in and read to see what's happening with her. I'm sure she knows I still do. I admit I will always have a small place for her in my heart. I dropped her a birthday wish on her birthday, and she had the good heart to give me her condolences when my grandmother passed away. While I don't think we could ever be friends due to the intensity of the relationship we had, it was nice to be cordial when it was appropriate.

Here's a bit of irony: I've moved on and improved my quality of life; new job, new girl, better outlook in general. On the other hand, she is in the same place she was a year ago: bored, unhappy, and confused over what to do with herself. I guess in one way it's satisfying to know I was able to pick up the pieces and grow from the experience. The flip side is, I'm concerned for her and I do hope she finds a way to be happy. She really deserves it. I know at this time a year ago she was, but something in the heart convinced her it was better to set me free. I guess I should thank her for it.

So to Trixie I say good luck moving on. I know you made the right choice, because several months ago someone made the decision for me, and I am happier because of it.

posted by That 30's Guy @ 12:38 PM, |


"911...I Need A Man!"

This is a fucking classic news story, reported today during Robin Quivers' news segment on The Howard Stern Show (if you're a Howard fan and haven't purchased a Sirius, then what the fuck are you waiting for?!).

Apparently, a desperate and lonely 45 year-old Oregon woman named Lorna Jeanne Dudash called back 911 with an emergency, of sorts. She wanted the cute deputy who just left her home to come back so she could "know his name" and that she doesn't "know how to go about doing that without calling 911".

The classic line of this call, which can be heard through the link in this CNN.com article, says it all: "He's the cutest cop I've seen in a long time. I just want to know his name. Heck, it doesn't come very often a good man comes to your doorstep."

The deputy return alright. To bust her sorry ass. Lorna, next time, sign up for Match.co or e-harmony!

posted by That 30's Guy @ 10:18 PM, |


The Countdown(s) Begin

We're officially 6 days way from me being able to say,"So--this is my 30's?"

Next weekend's big shindig is steadily become a reality. Yesterday, Batgirl volunteered to help me clean my backyard up for the occasion. At first I didn't want her to since she's done so much in buying supplies and shopping for catered food. However, the task was going to be a tedious one and would probably take a couple of days for me to do alone. With a heatwave coming, the thought of sweating my life away in 90+ degree heat was none to appealing. Luckily, my younger brother (with whom I own and share the house) was around to help and we got the whole thing done. Well--it's not the nicest yard, but it looks A LOT better.

My girlfriend is a hard worker. She was a machine. She even went out of her way to go get her dad's leaf blower a few towns away. I never used one, and that was a site to see as the thing shot off like a cannon and starting blowing dirt everywhere. Eventually, I was able to tame the wild beast and loosen up the dirt and mud caked into the cracks and crevices in the pavement. Meanwhile she attacked any remaining weeds my weed killer failed on, and picked up the leave piles I had raked. After a lunch break, we headed to a discount store and purchased two 10' x 10' canopies. The neighbors must have got a real good laugh watching us struggle with our test run of one canopy. It took at least 20 minutes before we got the damn thing right. "We wouldn't last a day on Survivor," she joked as we struggled with the framing.

This is an amazing relationship. Doing things like this together build strong bonds. The closer we get to the six-month anniversary on the 27th, the more sentimental about it I get. This is my personal relationship record, and it's been so much easier than any of the past failed relationships. We're actually going to do something for my 30th that we talked about on our first date. At the time on that cold January night, July 23 seemed like eons away and something unlikely to experience together. Now--it's just days away, and things get better between us.

Friday night, before we headed out, she showed me the large stock of party supplies that was taking up her sunroom. She's outdone herself. One of my favorites is a large inflatable football cooler that me and the boys can re-use for our fantasy football draft next month. It's very touching to see the effort she's been putting into this birthday party. Even her dad is preparing the pan of sausage, pepper and onions, and her sister is cooking up a pan of kielbasa. Something tells me I may get misty-eyed next weekend when the party-goers are singing happy birthday. Batgirl, the presence of most of my closest friends, and the new job will be reasons for that.

The other countdown going on in my life is the start of the new job. I have five days remaining in my current job that I've held for 4 1/2 years. While it's been a miserable situation for much of the last year, it's put food on my table and allowed me the opportunity to afford a house. When I moved back here from New York City in 2001, I had about $200 to my name, and anything I made on my 401K. I had to move in with my parents while I repaired my financial well-being. I remember going to a Red Sox game on Labor Day weekend that year and not even being able to withdraw the amount of money I needed to pay for the whole day. I had taken a job as an account exec selling advertising time for a local television station, but my salary was several thousands of dollars less than I was making in the same job in NYC, combined with the weekend job I held in Jersey.

By November 2001, I had moved into an apartment that was minutes away from the TV station with two friends. Weeks later, my dad approached me about an opening in customer service at the company he worked for. The pay would be $10,000 more than what I was making for a base salary at the station. Since NONE of the local business owners I was calling on were interested in buying TV time (the economy had hit the skids post-9/11), I decided to interview. Obviously, I got the job, and as what happens with a lot of jobs, time passes and what seemed like a great situation eroded into a hard to manage one. Sure, I've gained a lot of financial stability and valuable experience that allowed me to land my new job, but I no longer feel like the place is a fit for me and what I want to accomplish professionally. It's a dead end. This Friday, I'm officially leaving what looks to be a company headed down a wrong path for one that has become one of the state's fastest-growing. Sounds like the right move to me.

So, yes. The countdowns are on. The coming days' posts will have some "20's nostalgia," no doubt. Turning 30 will truly be the next chapter in my life. It looks like the beginning of it is going to be one of the best parts of the book.

posted by That 30's Guy @ 11:13 AM, |


Making the Effort

Batgirl and I finally had our talk about her socializing with the significant others of my friends. What precipitated the conversation was Nern's fiance asked him to get Batgirl's cell phone number so she could invite her out with the girls for the bachelorette party on Saturday night. I hesitated, then tossed out the possibility that she wouldn't be able to go since it was last minute, and she doesn't really know everyone and it may be uncomfortable for her.

At firt, she sounded open to the idea, but then when I told her Master K's girlfriend was going (the two didn't hit it off at all when they met), Batgirl backed down and said "I have plans with my friends." I have my doubts she really does, but using that excuse was good enough for me. We hung up and I later let Nern know it was last minute and she already made plans with a friend.

Later on, I called Batgirl to discuss an idea for what we could do tonight and she brought up the bachelorette party. She gave me the okay to give her cell phone number in order for Angel to call her and she could meet up with the group for a drink. She felt like it would be disrespecting Angel if she didn't go at all, and it could make for an awkward time at the birthday bash next weekend. I was glad she wanted to take this step, but a part of me said,"Hey--the fact she wants to make an effort is good enough for me."

I told her she shouldn't compromise her plans to make me happy. I just wanted her to give Shep (Master K's girl and possible future wife) a break at the party next week and make an effort to get to know the girls a little better. I went on to say I understood that just because all us guys are such great pals doesn't mean the girls will blend. We've known each over 20 years, and our women are not acquaintances by choice. She is willing to try, but she finally explained her distaste for Shep.

Apparently, the night she met her and some of the others in the group, she didn't like the way Shep was delving into The Attorney's sex life with his girl (who was absent, as usual). She doesn't like to divulge in such private info, be it about her or another person, and didn't want to be a part of the conversation. I wasn't really aware of this talk at the bar we were at since I was playing pool. I see things her way a bit better now, but told her that it isn't a bad thing to politely say "I'm sorry, but I'm just not comfortable talking about my sex life with That 30's Guy," if the situation turned to her. Hey--people have their pet peeves, and I can accept that.

On the flip side, Shep was coming off as a bitch that night, and there are whispers among the guys (and Master K's own family) that she may not be the best thing for our good friend. Perhaps Batgirl may be a better judge of character than the rest of us.

I'm rather satisfied with the discussion we had, but it would have been cool if Batgirl still gave me the go ahead to give her number to Angel since the girl is making an effort to include her. Perhaps they couldn't get together on that night, but some other time. The two have a profession in common, close in age, and have always been cordial when we've hung out. There's got to be something they can talk about! Ah well. We haven't seen each other all week, and I'm looking forward to spending the night together--alone--and relaxing. It's been a whirlwind couple of weeks.

Enjoy the weekend!

7 days until I get out of jail (er, last day at this job)

posted by That 30's Guy @ 12:41 PM, |


Late Night Ramblings

Man. It's been tough to get back in the blogging groove after taking a 2-month hiatus. Recapturing the old audience is proving to be even tougher. I forgot what it was like back at the beginning when I got a couple of dozen hits, if I was lucky. By the time I had to unceremoniously tear down the old blog, I was getting a couple hundred a day! I guess you can call this one a work in progress. Oh well. Onto some random thoughts...

posted by That 30's Guy @ 11:42 PM, |


My Summer Vacation, By Lindsay and Pam

For those of you who are not a daily reader of What Would Tyler Durden Do? are missing an entertaining report on the escapades of our favorite (and least favorite celebs). Over the last week, the question of just what the hell do celebrities do all day came to mind as I viewed this site's coverage of Lindsay Lohan's vacation (or is this just a typical day for her?), courtesy of your friendly neighborhood paparazzi.

Some photos are doing it for me in a big way. As a self-proclaimed "breast connoisseur", it doesn't take much for me to get excited when I see a set of breasts bursting out of a bikini top. Every day there seems to be new shots of the girl in little clothing. Double-L apparently is proud of her mysteriously disappearing/reappearing Ta Ta's because she's shown them in a few different swimsuits over the last week. It's been like Christmas for a Breast Man. However, seeing her lounging around in the sun with nothing better to do while I slave in an office all week does make me a little ill. The girl can't sing, and I don't consider her much of an actress either. As far as I am concerned, she's just part-time eye candy when she isn't starving herself silly, but somehow she's made millions and can spend her summer doing nothing. Ah well. Someday I can be doing the same.

While Lindsay is frolicking around with her pals and flaunting her flapjacks, Pamela Anderson is literally bouncing around on a boat named "Thunder Gulch" with one of her young sons, barely covered in a bikini of her own. Courtesy of WWTDD.com yet again, I've been treated to a couple of days of seeing Pam's bazookas casually displayed for the kid and the captain and all to see. Monday, though, Pam took it too far as there are shots of her and another woman TOPLESS right in front of the kid. Man! Talk about being spoiled for all women the rest of your life! Someone is going to have to teach this kid that not all women are created with silicone jugs freely flapping in the wind.

As thrilled as I am to see one of my top 10 all-time celebrity babes I wanna bang wearing next to nothing, doing it right in front of her son takes it a little too far. Sure, she doesn't nearly drop her kid charging out of a building, or ride around with him in the front seat of car, but show a little modesty Major Guns, would ya?

posted by That 30's Guy @ 12:25 PM, |


Two Weeks Notice

For all of you waiting in anticipation of a dramatic resignation at my job today are going to be, well, disappointed. The talk with my "Boy Wonder" boss was anticlimactic to say the least.

For as nervous as I was, I kept calm as I explained that I had accepted a new position at a fast-growing company, and it was an opportunity too good for me to pass up. Basically, he reacted with a smile and said "Congratulations." I don't think he is shocked by my leaving, to be honest. About a year ago he and I had a long talk about my place in the company. When he asked me to start thinking about where I saw myself with the company in the future, I immediately responded with,"I honestly don't see where else I can go here." Perhaps he has a better memory than I gave him credit for.

I remained mum the rest of the morning, but at lunch he took out the two senior-most members of my department to inform them of my move. I decided it was time to start letting the office know. The funny thing is, the members of management who have been with this company for a long time greeted the news with,"You lucky S.O.B."

If that isn't an indication of just how right this move is, than I don't what is.

Tuesday's task will be to see if I can get the vacation pay owed to me. As of my last paycheck, I have 122 hours due. That is over 3 weeks. My parents believe that for some reason I should be getting this. I don't see how. 3 Weeks is a lot of cash on my salary. My mom went off on a rant tonight and advised me that if I'm told they won't pay me that vacation time, then I should tell them I will be using it right away because I'm entitled to it. Anyone out there agree or disagree with the parentals? Is this a valid request of an outgoing employee? I'm of the belief you don't burn bridges, and for a company that has handed me baseball tickets, taken me on trips, and given me generous raises, I think going out like that is as Bush league as A-Rod's swat at Bronson Arroyo's glove when he was being tagged out in game 6 of the 2004 ALCS (right).

The coming days should be very interesting since I have not sat down with the owner of the company (Boy Wonder's dad, who is the guy that hired me in the first place) or the VP (who is the oldest son and of the same age as me, and a main reason many in management are unhappy). Of the two, I expect the oldest son to give me a little bit of a hard time, but perhaps this will be the epiphany for him that something's wrong with the company because they can't keep great people. In the meantime, I'll keep working and do what I can to help my soon-to-be co-workers deal with the void I leave behind. It's the least I can do for them because it's going to be a long, hard road for the rest of the summer.

posted by That 30's Guy @ 9:57 PM, |


Could WE Be Next?

Pretty exhausting last few days for That 30's Guy. Starting with the good news on Thursday that I would be offered a new job, the happiness carried over into Friday with the reception of the offer letter and benefits package I need to have filled out by next Monday and then the rehearsal dinner for Batgirl's brother and his fiance. Saturday, the wedding, and then today, dinner at my folks house...and the mental preparation to give me official 2-weeks notice tomorrow morning.

This post is about my first real experience in being part of a special event for a girlfriend's family, and where it's taking my thoughts. Never in all my years of dating have I been included in an event as important to a girlfriend's family as a wedding. Between the dinner on Friday night where everyone in Batgirl's family was hugging me and congratulating me on the new job, and sitting in the front rows with the immediate family members as Batgirl's brother exchanged vows with his bride, I really felt like part of the family. It's hard for me to fathom how close this woman and I have grown in 5 1/2 months, and how much her family values my being in their daughter's life. Believe it or not, I actually sat in the row with her parents at the request of her dad and her mom during the ceremony.

I honestly felt uncomfortable being up there that close, and being included in their family photos the night of the rehearsal dinner. You never know with relationships. One day you're madly in love, then suddenly be broken up when you least expect it. All this has been uncharted waters for me, and I'm not sure what to make of it. While I appreciate how welcome I am to be part of the family, I also had a hard time processing it early on Saturday. What if things between me and Batgirl fizzle out in a couple of months, or several months, down the road? Here I am in these photos capturing the most important event in the son's life to this point, locked in forever.

Then a strange thing happened at the wedding reception: I started settling into things. I became comfortable in the setting. I was off on my own at times, talking with guests, mostly cousins of hers whom I met a previous wedding we went to a couple of months ago. I didn't need her by my side all night. It was almost like I was, well, family. The eye-opening statement of the day, however, was made by one of Batgirl's cousins, she by my side: "Looks like you two are next."

This was the first time I began to feel the weight of expectations. I try to keep expectations to a minimum, especially when it comes to my romantic relationships. However, with Batgirl, I get the sense of hope from my family that this is THE ONE. I think yesterday gave me a sense that the same hope exists with hers. I mean, at the end of the night when her brother and new sister-in-law sharing their final dance, her dad was looking around for me to join with this family as the guests circled the happy couple. When I found my way in, he put his arm around my shoulders. I was touched by this gesture. On the other side of me was my woman, looking beautiful as ever, and as happy as she could be. This is a whole lot to process for a perennially single guy like me!

I'm sure some of this was from being caught up in the day, but I do wonder what might be going on in her head when it comes to our future. In a couple of weeks, we'll be celebrating our 6-month anniversary. Batgirl's 33rd birthday comes a few weeks later on the same day one of my best friends ties the knot. I know she wants to have a family of her own one day, and as she nears her mid-30's, time has to be a consideration. Our age difference isn't very great, but our places in life are slightly different. She's a divorcee (divorced for over 4 years), but making a great living for herself, and has saved wisely. Me--I'm just going to be hitting 30, still trying to find a good career, and I'm not quite where I'd like to be in terms of getting my financial future in place. Still, we are the best things to come along in each other's lives in a long time.

While we still have the issue about her interactions with my social circle to resolve (FYI--she's a natural around my family), I got a reminder yesterday of the kind of woman I have. She was elegant, beautiful, and fun-loving as she line danced with her sister in front of the guests. I thought to myself,"God I hope she can do this at Nern's wedding next month," because I know she'd really win a lot of people over who aren't sure about her yet. God knows, she's won me over in a big way.

So, I'm sure you are wondering--what going on in your head about this subject of "being next"? Well, it was nice for one day to sit back and say, you know, if Batgirl is going to be my wife, then I will be very happy. I'm sure, though, after some time alone in the next couple of days as I concentrate on my life again, I'll realize that there's still a lot more to learn about her and this is much too soon to even be considering. For now, we're having fun and are enjoying the excitement of what the future will brings us. Worrying about "being next" can wait a while longer.

Monday night: The Two Weeks Notice!

posted by That 30's Guy @ 11:00 PM, |


Take This Job And Shove It!

Finally. Finally That 30's Guy is breaking free from the chains of hell.

Otherwise known as...my job.

Two years of looking, applying, resume tailoring, interviewing, and banging my head on my desk finally paid off this morning.

As longtime readers of my previous blog know, I was never happy with my job. I bitched about it a lot, either on the blog, or to my friends, or to ex-girlfriend last summer. She was as miserable as I was in her place, and we turned to each other for comfort (FYI, based on what I'm reading on her blog, she unfortunately is reliving the same nightmare). Still, they paid me well, gave me perks like tickets to ball games on the third baseline, but just couldn't seem to run a competent office.

Since the days when I first started 4 1/2 years ago, the place has declined from a well-oiled machine with harmonious people, to a disorganized mess with drones moping around. Two years ago, they resassigned my responsibilities to do a job of two people, while leaving my customers whom I handled very well in the lurch. Imagine: an inside sales office where NO ONE has assigned accounts. Instead, when customers call in, they are thrust to "first-available." My old customers refused to let me move on. To this day, I still have to take care them while doing my job of two people. I guess when the guy you report to is 5 years your junior and his last name is on the side of the building, these type of things will happen. To this development...

For some time my cousin encouraged me to apply to the company he works for. It has grown in size to about 4 times the # of employees, and will be moving into its third building in his four years there in 2007. I finally applied in the Spring, and got the call to come in for an interview last month. I interviewed very well, and within a few days I received an offer. Unfortunately, the pay was $6K under my current salary. No could do. I wrote off the opportunity and kept my eyes peeled for new ones elsewhere on Monster.com and Careerbuilder.com. Then, 2 weeks ago I come home to a message from another hiring manager in this company who proposed I meet with him about some other positions their looking to fill. The hiring manager who interivewed me in June spoke highly of me and encouraged this guy to pursue a meeting. We set the date for today, and within 15 minutes, I got an offer close to what I'm making. I honestly didn't expect it, and I jumped. Batgirl was the first person I called, and her excitement for me brought an even bigger smile to my face. She was so happy for me, as has been my friends and family today.

It seems it still hasn't hit me yet. The whole thing seems surreal. Is this actually going to happen? It can't be? Thing is, it's a reality. I will be receiving an offer letter in the mail in the next couple of days, and by this time on Monday I will have put in my two weeks notice. I will begin my new job the day after my 30th birthday. Can you believe it?!

My leaving will cause a state of chaos in an already chaotic environment. I don't look forward to the closed door talks with Boy Wonder, his older brother (the VP--who happens to be MY age), and their father, the owner, next week. I know they will be disappointed and a bit hurt, but this is what's best for me. My earning potential and ability to grow professionally will skyrocket in this new job; I don't have that type of future where I am now. It's time to take on a new challenge.

Wow. I guess that crossroads I was looking at a year ago is finally straightening out.

posted by That 30's Guy @ 6:46 PM, |


Relationship Ups & Downs

On the heels of my post regarding the trip to hang with my college buddies, my girlfriend by my side, it hit me how quickly there can be downs in a relationship with someone where there are so many ups. This was especially evident to me yesterday as we made our rounds to celebate the 4th.

The plan was to hit the beach house owned by the family of my pal, The Attorney, then skip over to Batgirl's friends home a few minutes away to end the day.

We get to the house, and I am greeted on the porch by the Attorney's dad and sister, the sister's new fiance, and a friend of the sister. Attorney made his way outside with his girlfriend (who Batgirl seems to get along with very well, yet the rest of us don't care for her due to some of her bahavior and treatment of my friend). We all sat down and chatted for a bit before his dad and future-brother-in-law decided to go in for a quick nap (the two had gone fishing very early in the morning) and the sister went with her friend to the beach. Things seemed to be going very well as the four us BS'ed before Attorney realized he needed to grab some rub for his ribs he was going to grill. Batgirl and I joined him for the ride so we could see the new house his parents were building on a nearby lot. As we sat in the car waiting from him to come back out, Batgirl went on to make a comment about how snotty Attorney's sister came across.

Now, I'll agree that she can come off that way--but in just a little under a half-hour, one can make that assumption? The comment didn't quite rub me the wrong way, but she really ticked me off when we left for the evening. The Attorney's dad came out and apologized for not spending more time with us, and I was totally fine with that. We got in the car and as we pulled out, Batgirl commented how The Attorney's dad was "so full of himself".

I was stunned by this comment and replied with,"That comment is waaay off base." The Attorney's dad has always been one of the most encouraging of my friends' parents, I added. He always asks how you were doing, what your were up to, and would offer advice when he could if you are struggling with something.

She retorted that the fact he went in to take a nap was rather rude. I pointed out that he was probably up by 5am that morning to go fishing (as is his usually his routine), and wanted to get some shuteye before dinner. Needless to say, she backed down. Still, I was pretty pissed because this was one judgement that she should have reserved.

Now, I don't want to come across as being unhappy with my relationship. Batgirl has done everything for me that I could want from a girlfriend. To knew readers, you may think she is a bitch. It's not true. As recently as Monday night, she grilled up a feast on her new grill, and we sat out in her backyard sipping wine and eating like royalty. Plus, she's really putting an effort into planning my 30th birthday bash. This woman really loves me, and she shows it (she wrote me a heartfelt card over the weekend, that really wamred my heart). The critical judgements, however, are a troubling characteristic. These people she's being introduced to are people I've know most of my life, and are people I respect and value. These are people who would be my guests at a wedding if we ever got married.

Yes, this is truly something I am miffed about today, and I'll need to discuss it with her before we have another event involving another couple(s). I'd do it sooner, but it's her brother's wedding this weekend and I do not want to upset her. She's stressed enough. Plus, I'd rather find the right words to delicately talk about this.

Being quick to judge is one of the things my mother constantly does, and it's a quality about her that I never cared for. Having it present in my girlfriend isn't welcome either.

posted by That 30's Guy @ 12:39 PM, |


Ozzie's All-Stars

As much as I like Ozzie Guillen, I have a big problem with the fact he chose to take his guy, Mark Buerhle, to this year's All-Star Game over Curt Schilling. I know I sound like a typical whinny Red Sox fan, but Schill has one more win (10), a slightly better ERA (3.54 vs. 3.86), and hasn't been shelled the way Buerhle did Sunday against the Cubs, giving up TEN--yes TEN--earned runs.

The snub of Schilling, and this stupid rule MLB instituted a few years ago that at least one player from each ball club must be an All-Star, means a guy like the Royals' Mark Redman is an "all-star" and Curt is not. I'm sorry, but as a close follower of the game, I have a hard time digesting this.

The same can be said for Tampa Bay's Carl Crawford. This guy can field, hit, run bases, and improves with every season, yet he's still not good enough to make this squad? He makes the much-improved D-Ray offense go 'round. He can't get the spot over Gary Matthews Jr, a journeyman that the players voted onto the team as a "feel good pick"? Sounds like "office politics" to me.

I also have a problem with Ozzie not inviting Jim Leyland of the Tigers to be on his bench. Leyland has resurrected the once-woeful Tigers and is running away with Manager of the Year. Sure, Ozzie's White Sox are chasing the Tigers, but give Leyland his due.

posted by That 30's Guy @ 10:36 PM, |


Can't We All Just Get Along?

Introducing a new love in your life can be both exciting, and stressful. While my girlfriend and I have been together for over 5 months, she's still "new" to my closest friends. This past weekend, I took "Batgirl" (nicknaming her so because she's a Batman fan, looks great in her tight T-shirt with the Batman logo, and there's no way in hell I'm posting her name here) to Gotham--better known as NY City--to meet the college crew. I wanted so very much for everyone, especially the guys' significant others, to welcome her in. The memories of my pal Nern's post-graduation dinner in May that didn't go so well for Batgirl and the girlfriends of the friends from home were still very much fresh in my head.

Between she and I, we had a great time. We went to the "Top of the Rock," which is the observatory deck in Rockefeller Center, took a walk to the old neighborhood I used to work in, strolled past the United Nations building, visited Madame Tussaud's Wax Museum, and browsed the huge Toys R' Us store in Times Square. Our hotel room was comfortable. The location worked well since it was around the corner from the subway and down the street from my friend Vegas' apartment building. When it's just me and her, I think she is happiest. However, I don't think she was very impressed with a select few members of the group.

Friday night, it was only she and myself, Big Red and his wife (the couple who was the main reason for this college reunion), and our hosts Vegas and his girlfriend. The five of them gave me a big thumbs up on Batgirl, but I was a little bothered by how the two girls seemed to do the same thing that the girls from back home did. They conversed between each other, and occasionally turned their attention to Batgirl. On the other hand, Batgirl could have done a better job of endearing herself to the girls. I understand how intimidating it can be to meet a whole new group, but I was expecting her to be more open this time with this crew. Last time, the excuse was a bad case of laringytis; this time, I wasn't sure if she was just tired or being shy.
Anyhow, things seemed ok that first night. It was night #2 where things became rocky. To begin, we did a Tappas dinner at a Spanish restaurant. Our party had ballooned to 17 people. Everyone had come in from all over. I never ate this style of dining, so I was pretty lost on how to go about ordering; so did Vegas and his gf. When it was obvious the confusion was widespread, Batgirl leaned over to me and whispered, "This wasn't a very good idea." She had already made some analytical observations on our hosts, so I could tell that this chaos was not changing her opinion. Eventually, things settled down and the dinner went well. As least, I thought. By the end of dinner, Batgirl had become rather quiet and I was a little on edge as far as whether or not she would enjoy our final night.

We made it to a bar, and once inside, Vegas began bossing the group and telling people to move into another area of the bar. I knew we couldn't go there because it was for dining only. He insisted we all go in. No soon enough, our caravan was being summoned back into the bar area. Batgirl offered to buy me a beer while I hit the john. When I got back, she was at the furthest end of the bar from the rest of the group. This prompted Vegas to come over and make a comment about that. Batgirl's impatience with him shined through. She asked me what his problem was and yadda yadda. My friend The FBI Agent (soon-to-be) overheard her words and assured her that Vegas comes off the wrong way at times with people, but in the end shows he a good guy. Usually. The night went from there and she seemed to enjoy herself as my friends goofed back and forth with me, her and each other. All the while, the girls were off in their own circle. Then, the straw broke the camel's back.

Batgirl headed to the ladies' room. I was talking with someone when I felt a pinch at my ass. I turned and it was Vegas' girlfriend. No problem to me; she was joking around. Shortly after, Batgirl returned. Vegas' girlfriend pinched me again. I turned and asked her if she wants me to sit down on her. She then proceeds to tell Batgirl she was pinching my ass, and it's a nice one. I took it as a joke again, but apparently Batgirl did not. She held in her anger the remainder of the night very well, but once we got back, she let it out about everything. How she felt disrespected by the act, how she knows who she is but doesn't think she can say the same for Vegas and his gf, how she very much wanted to like my friends and their "better" halves, and be like back, but just couldn't relate to the girls' conversations about superficial girlie bullshit she's not into.

My initial reaction to her comments was disappointment, and a little hurt. Afterall, Vegas is one of my best friends. I know he and his girlfriend have a good opinion of Batgirl, but the feeling isn't reciprocated. Because of the ass-pinching, Batgirl got very jealous and suspected that she may have an interest in me. Admittedly, I'd get pretty pissed if one of the guys took a squeeze of one of my girlfriend's cheeks. The end result was me having to politely decline Vegas' invitation for breakfast with the knowledge that Batgirl wanted nothing to do with being in the presence of my friend's girl. It made me feel guilty, and when we bumped into them on the street looking at a sidewalk menu at a restaurant instead of "grabbing something quick before heading home" at a place like a deli, I really had to do some tap-dancing.

I guess my point here is I can't understand how it's so difficult for women to welcome other women. Here is this guy who you've always rooted for to meet a nice woman, and then when he does you don't include her in on conversations, or you do something to disrespect her. The incident in May that ticked her off involved the girlfriend (and likely fiance) of my close friend Master K continuously teasing Batgirl about why we were late to the post-dinner gathering at Nern's apartment. She was harping on the belief Batgirl and I took off to get busy after dinner. Oh--and she was doing this in front of Nern's future mother-in-law who was meeting my girlfriend for the first time. Batgirl felt cheap and blamed her being left out of the conversations on this open teasing. Now, I will have to come up with reasons as to why she won't be with me when I go up to see Master K's new condo later this month.

I don't get it. With guys, we shake hands, have a beer, and ask some questions, and
find topics that eventually lead to laughter or some interesting debate. Nothing catty like the shit I hear about from my female friends.

On the other side of the coin, my girlfriend is not totally innocent here. Growing up, she was a "geek," and never was invited to parties. She wasn't part of the "in" crowd, and I think this is something she still is bitter about as an adult. She pointed out to me after Saturday night's butt-pinching incident that she's never trusted girls, and its always just been she, her sister, and her mom. No one else. She marvels at the fact I have so many friends I am close with, whereas she doesn't have that. Hey, not many people do keep close bonds with a wide group of childhood pals. As someone in her 30's though, I think there comes a point where you have to realize you're not who you were in your teens, and analyzing why you can't like someone has to stop.

I'm really getting into this topic because it disturbs me that in the two meetings with my group of friends--the people who've been right there with me for the last 10-20 years--the first woman I've ever had a truly meaningful and loving relationship with is passing judgments left and right. the judgements usually have something to do with their girlfriends. I am now very hesitant to schedule a dinner with my best friend of many years, Ren, and his wife. Ren's wife can come off rather bitchy because she's shy at times, and I don't need to hear yet another critique of her when she's been so good to me and supportive over the years. I have a feeling the two won't hit it off, and Ren and I will have to carry the evening.

As a guy who's not used to having a longterm relationship, I don't know if I should have done things differently. Should I have eased her into meeting the couples so that when we have big group events, all would have some level of familiarity with her? She says she can handle these large group situations; perhaps I should listen? Should I have told Vegas' gf to stop pinching my ass since it may make my girl jealous? Or, is the problem bigger than this. Is my girlfriend really not compatible with any of the females in the crews? I'd like to hear some accounts from both the female POV, and from those on my side, of situations like this.

posted by That 30's Guy @ 7:16 AM, |